Our Meaning Of Love
by A-J MAD
Summary: Will Aaron and Jackson relationship survive the crash? ***Latest chapter  - Jackson finally wakes from the coma. Confused but happy that Aaron is with him***
1. Chapter 1  I Love You

chapter 1 – I Love You

10/10/10

Wake up  
I have been waiting for you  
to open your eyes  
So that I can tell you

that I think I'm ready  
I'm ready to freefall into  
into the unknown  
if you wanna be with me

Dave Lichen – Let Go

5 weeks it's been...5 weeks since the car/train crash, 5 weeks since that dramatic night the four men had to go through and 5 weeks since Jackson had been laying in hospital. Day by day week by week people surrounded Jacksons bed Aaron, Hazel, Paddy, Chas, Sol, Adam hoping and praying that some light will shine on him that any minute now his big brown eyes would just be staring up at them with that cheeky smile across his face. But it seemed too much to ask for as it had already been 5 weeks since the crash and there was no improvement in Jackson's condition. Aaron was beside his self, filled with worry guilt and anger. Blaming his self, of course he would blame his self his stupid childish behaviour he kept thinking.

'' If I paid Mickey when I was meant to none of this would have happened! me and Jackson wouldn't have fallen out! ... We wouldn't have been at bar west that night... We would of more than likely been at home... in our bed... together'' he kept thinking to himself. He was so scared of losing Jackson he couldn't think how he would cope without him, would I even want to cope without him? He kept asking himself. He felt so helpless he wanted to do more for Jackson do more to help Jackson come round to open his eyes... to smile. But All Aaron could do was sit by his side and hold his hand telling him that he is here for him and that he will get better, praying he would get better.

Everyone else had walked away from the crash with minor injuries why did it have to be Jackson Aaron kept saying to himself ''why did it have to be the man I'm in love with'' shocking himself when he thought of Jackson like that. It was the first time Aaron had actually realise how he actually feels for Jackson which in one way was a relief for him but on the other hand made him angry. Relieved that he could actually have his finger on how he feels for his boyfriend but angry that he had now finally found his love for Jackson, after 3 months of digging deep he'd finally found love for the man that laid in front of him but he couldn't tell him how he felt because of the sate Jackson was in.

Paddy was rather proud of the way Aaron was handling the situation. He was so proud of how much time Aaron would spend at the hospital. He hardly spent any time at home, He hardly eat anything. By him doing these things would mean him not being with Jackson and even known everyone knew how hot headed Aaron could get at times paddy especially he was dealing with this the best way he could but of course he did have his moments. Moments of guilt, Moments of worry thinking his boyfriend won't make it and moments or pure and outer anger. But he was there for Jackson day in day out by his side which made hazel so proud and happy.

He was like a rock to hazel over the last several weeks even know they have never seen eye to eye they both loved Jackson both cared for him and they were the most important 2 people in Jackson's life. The last 5 weeks had been heartbreaking for hazel seeing her son her only son laying in front of her almost lifeless no movement what so ever if broke her heart. When she wasn't at the hospital she would be out buying bits for Jackson or spending some time with Ashley even know she wasn't a very religious person she was praying everyday for her beautiful son to wake from his coma.

Aaron and hazel was the two fixtures in the hospital, hazel would joke ''were part of the furniture up here Aaron'' trying to get the odd smile out of Aaron which was a struggle. She had grown so much trust and love in Aaron they really had connected over the last couple weeks shame Jackson wasn't awake to see them too she would say to herself. Every night they would take it in turns to stay the night as Jackson couldn't be left alone in their eyes. They wanted either one of them to be there when he woke up. It was Aarons turn to stay that night he went to go get a cuppa and couple car mags to pass the time while leaving hazel to say her goodbyes. Hazel looked over her boy leaning forward to give him a big kiss on his forehead and then she would say the same thing every night "Love u boy, see you tomorrow try and wake up for me".

Aaron returned to the room just as hazel was leaving giving her a brief cuddle and promising like every night that he would ring if there was any change. Even know they said that to each other every night they hadn't ever had to ring one another there was never anything to report back to each other. There was never any change.

But tonight...

***Would just like to say i am planing on taking this story further. Taking the story into the new year and flashbacks into J & A's relationship. This is my first story and my first time writtin so please note that, i'm n expert just trying my best :P loool. Reviews would be brillant thanks :)***


	2. Chapter 2  3 Words

Chapter 2 – 3 words

11/10/10 - earlier hours

I said I L-O-V-E Y-O-U  
I'm so into you boy  
he said M-E T-O-O  
It's obvious I'm so into you boy  
So why don't we ( we ) hold ( hold ) on ( on ) for ( to ) love  
Through the ups and downs never let go  
Holdin' on forever never let go¨  
It all started with 3 words, saved my life

Cheryl Cole – 3 Words

Aaron settled down into the chair next to Jackson. When he was on his own he'd usually grab the other chair from the other side of the room to put his feet up on. To get a bit more comfy for a long night of thinking and worrying.

Looking over Jacksons body laying there peacefully in one way relaxed Aaron he knew he wasn't in any pain at least he was at ease he would think to his self. It didn't take long for him to cast back over his earlier judgement. "I love Jackson...I actually love him" he kept repeating it to himself thinking that at any minute the thought would send his mind into overload and he would see the wrong in being able to let his self fall in love with another man. He had always told himself and paddy and various other members of the family that he would never love another man he couldn't possibly let himself fall in love with a man.

Firstly because even know he has came along way since realising he was gay and everything he had been through with Jackson, hitting him, the court case, finding each other again and then lately all the trouble with Mickey he still wasn't 100% happy with being gay and being in a relationship. And secondly he told himself he would never fall in love because he could not go through with the hurt and pain that comes with love the part that rips you to pieces. "Everyone I have ever loved has either left me or betrayed me in some way" he said to himself "I will never let that happen again". But after finally admitting to himself that he was in love and that he couldn't stop the feeling his body came over all numb. He knew Jackson loved him he didn't understand why, he didn't see what Jackson saw in him in his eyes Jackson was far too good for him and he had strike lucky when finding Jackson.

Lost in his own thoughts Aaron wasn't paying any attention to Jackson what so ever. He normally just zoned out in his own world even know he wished for Jackson to wake up he was used to the quite nights spent with his boyfriend since the crash they had been no movement from Jackson what so ever so Aaron was used to the silence he was used to his boyfriends lifeless body lying in front of him. Still lost in his own little world he finally snapped out of his day dream and suddenly sat up straight staring at Jackson.

"Jackson...Jackson can u hear me babe" Aaron shouted out. Noticing Jacksons hand had moved from the side of him to now be resting on his own chest. Aaron was franticly staring at Jackson when his heart stopped beating and his eye over whelmed in tears at the sight of his man his Jacksons beautiful brown eyes staring up at him. "Your awake!...Your actually awake oh my god I can't believe it, how you feeling? Can I get you any think" Aaron quickly spoken with the biggest grin on his face. Jackson didn't reply for a second moving his hand to his face to remove the oxygen mask he then looked into Aarons eyes. "Aaron...what...were...what happened?" Jackson mumbled Aaron heard every word but sat back in his chair thinking how he was going to tell him that he was involved in a car crash and that he had been in a coma for just over 5 weeks. " It doesn't matter what happened Jackson not right now anyways the important thing is that your awake your actually awake" Aaron barely finished his sentence before bursting out in tears throwing his head onto Jacksons lap . Jackson moved his hand onto Aarons head.

Feeling Jacksons touch had thrown shivers down Aarons body; he has longed for Jacksons touch for weeks longed to see his big brown eyes staring into his making his heart melt. After a minute Aaron lifted his head and took Jacksons hand into his. "Listen jay...I don't want to go into details but we was all involved in a bad car crash" Aaron paused grasping for air trying to control his emotions. "Me, Paddy and Marlon got of lightly only minor injuries but you...you haven't been so lucky" Jackson was looking puzzled while Aaron continued to fill him in on the

crash. "you have been in a coma for the last 5 weeks me an your mum have been so worried so has everyone else but me and your mum have been here every day sharing the night shift so you wasn't and have never been on your own we wanted one of us to be here when u woke up I'm so glad it was me" Aaron smiled looking into Jacksons eyes.

Jackson smiled at the last comment he was glad that he was there too. " I can't tell you how sorry I am babe...I know you're going to say it isn't my fault but I can't help but think it is...but I'm so glad you awake I was so worried I would never speak, see, kiss u again" Aaron said looking at the ground because of what he was about to say. "I want you to know that whatever the outcome is whatever the doctors tell us tomorrow on how bad your condition is I want you to know that I am here for you here to look after you here to give you everything you need because...I...I...love you" staring into Jackson eyes with a smile on his face. Jackson at this point had tears rolling down his cheek even know he wasn't at all with it he knew and understood what Aaron was saying and couldn't believe he had just said them three words to him.

TBH...


End file.
